Should we...because we can?

Rusty links and then comments on a couple of news articles chronicling the cost and experience of a modern day prom night. He then finishes his piece by asking, “Do Christians think, by mimicking such a culture's every move, that they are evangelizing to them?”

I often tell my daughters that just because they can [mimic others] doesn’t mean they should [mimic others]. Of course my admonition is often the exact opposite of what they are hoping to hear because it is usually in response to them asking if they can do something I am less than enthusiastic about. Hopefully, this is a lesson my daughters are learning even as my point goes in one ear and out the other when they hear it.

This principle of purposeful behavior is not only applicable when deciding against bad behavior. Sometimes, even good behavior shouldn’t be mimicked. Just because Saddleback has been successful with a certain Church model doesn’t mean other Churches should automatically copy what they are doing there. Just because one person is successful at personal evangelism doesn’t mean God expects all of us to be personal evangelists. It’s sad how many people define success in terms of what they are good at doing.

In order to salt the earth, believers must be in the world, but not of the world. Of course Rusty is asking a rhetorical question where the obvious answer is “no” because mimicking the world is being of the world. As Rusty implies, most of what passes for Christianity nowadays, is indistinguishable from modern culture. Christians should be noticeably different. Believers in Christ have to offer an alternative to the world focus on self. Followers of Christ should be directing focus away from self and onto the purposes of God.

Just because we can follow others doesn’t mean we should always follow others. It is perfectly OK with God for each of us to be unique. After all, he created each and every one of us as an individual. It is just as OK for our group and our group focus to be unique as long as our purpose conforms to God’s leadership. Along the way, we may attract a few converts who need to break the shackles of modern culture.

Tough or Kind Parenting Dilemma

A dilemma I sometimes face as a parent is trying to teach my children to be both tough and kind. Someone who is tough is able to ignore the physical and emotional pain that prevents softer individuals from accomplishing worthwhile goals. Someone who is kind is able to understand and then relieve the physical or emotional pain of others, or avoid causing others to feel pain.

I don’t want my daughters to find a balance between “tough” and “kind” which leaves them a little bit tough and a little bit kind. I want them to understand how to be both extremely tough and extremely kind. When I punish them based on their behavior, I am teaching them a lesson in toughness, but I worry that they will learn a lesson in [the lack of] kindness that I don’t want them to learn. When I allow them to make bad decisions and not suffer the consequences, I am teaching them a lesson in kindness, but I worry that they will learn a lesson in [the lack of] toughness that I don’t want them to learn.

I always try to model the behavior I expect from my daughters and I also try my best to explain to them the concepts behind why I behave the way I do, but I don’t have a tool for measuring the results of my modeling and explanations. I hope and pray [a lot] that they are learning both.